“When I ask you if you want to do something, you know it’s always okay to say no, right?”
“Let me know if you get uncomfortable, okay?”
“How do you feel about (x activity)?”
(When someone’s insecure about having said no and asks if it’s okay/if you’re mad or upset they said no) “I’m disappointed to not do the thing, of course, but I’m much more glad you were willing to tell me (no/that you were uncomfortable/etc.). That’s really important to me. Thank you.”
“I’d ALWAYS rather be told no than make you feel pressured or do anything to hurt you or make you uncomfortable.”
“I care about you, so when something I do hurts you or makes you uncomfortable, I want to know, because I don’t like making you feel bad.”
“You can always change your mind, okay? The moment you wanna (stop/go home/take a break/etc), PLEASE tell me and we’ll stop right away. I won’t make a fuss, I don’t wanna keep going if you don’t want to.”
“Wanna do (x)? It’s okay if not, but I think it would be (fun/worthwhile/prudent).”
(When starting a social phone call): “Hey, are you busy right now?”
(When confirming plans made earlier): “Hey, are you still up for doing (x) at (time) on (day)?”
“Can I vent a little about (x)?”
“Can I tell you something (gross/depressing)?”
“Are you comfortable talking about it?”
“Do you think you could talk me through this problem I’ve been having? If you have the time and emotional energy of course.”
“It’s okay if that doesn’t work for you.”
“I’m interested in spending more time with you. Would you be interested in doing (x) together on (y day)?”
“No? Well let me know if you ever want to do something else.” (leave it open! don’t nag! let it go!)
“You don’t seem very interested in this. Should we skip it?”
(When someone doesn’t seem interested in something you were suggesting) “We can just (do something you both want to do) instead.” (don’t try to get them to do the thing again! let it go!)
Consent culture – it’s about way more than just sex!
Givepeople as much freedom as possible to make their own choices without pressure or control.
Even children deserve as much autonomy as allows them to remain safe and get their needs met – remember, you can’t train a child to make good/safe/healthy choices without ever giving them choices. A child who is taught to respect consent is a child who doesn’t assault people! A child who knows they have a right to say no is a child who knows that someone who infringes on their autonomy isn’t supposed to do that.
A consent-conscious relationship is a healthier and safer relationship, and a person who is aware of and deliberate about asking for, giving, receiving, refusing, and accepting refusals of consent is a healthier and safer person.
yes man cooking for the first time would either result in him the best fucking meal ever or him using random algorithms to determine what would be edible and making shit like this
no in between
yes man: you know, i might not be able to eat–but i wanted to surprise you today! i tried cooking for the first time! i analyzed the cookbooks that house had lying around and managed to make you something that you might like using all of those contents as reference, what do you think?
courier six: yes man i love you so fucking much but i dont think any human being could even attempt to consume that, would you like me to help you out?
alternate ending: courier six digs into yes man’s food and legit enjoys it because 1. they love him enough to do it and 2. the only food courier six has enjoyed up until this point is 200+ year old fancy lad snack cakes and flat nuka cola so they dont know what a wholesome meal is
PAYPAL IS TRYING TO SLIP THE RUG UNDER US. Or they may have said this and just no one read about it or noticed/knew.
OKAY SO BEFORE YOU SEND ANY MONEY FOR THAT AWESOME COMMISSION YOU WANT TO BUY FROM THAT AWESOME ARTIST. PLEASE STOP AND READ THIS.
Paypal changed the look of how you will fill out information and send money. Thus, you need to be super careful. Don’t go all willy nilly through and be like “Yeah yeah yeah send” you need to stop when you see this screen right away.
Before you proceed, you will first notice one major thing: your address is showing. What you need to do if you are ordering a DIGITAL WORK (aka, it is being sent to you via the interwebz) is you need to click on your address and there around be a drop down menu of 3 (or more) options:
No address needed
Your Current Address
+ Add a new shipping address
Be sure to select “No address needed”, it is very important that you do. If you leave your address in there, Paypal will assume that you are to receive a physical package. A physical package which needs proof that exists physically. Paypal will want the artist to provide shipping labels and tracking info on said package. This is bad, very, very bad. Artists can get in trouble if they cannot provide these things.
Please, if an artist asks to send you back your money so that you can send it again correctly, do not be offended. You are paying them to do your commission, how can they do your commission with no money?
Reblog this, send this around, if you want to make a proper tutorial go ahead, I hope this was clear enough as it is.
Important!!!
And in case the buyer does do this, there is a work around. All you have to do is click on the transaction and go to “edit tracking info” at the bottom.
Then go to order status and set to “Processed/Service Rendered.”
This will let paypal know that the order was a digital good, and no shipping was required.
You just have to check your incoming payments and make sure to do this if this does happen. Cause you aren’t notified otherwise. And you really only get in trouble if left unnoticed.
Reblogging again because I can’t stretch this enough!
emergencycommissions Not a commission post, but I think you may need this on the blog for people who are commissioning!
Yes, this is very important! I have a link to a post on our sidebar showing the same thing – this is why posts are tagged either ‘physical item’ or ‘digital file’
Time's Vengeance 