– male characters can wear dresses
– there are walking trees that give you hugs
– cut off a dragon tail and use it as a sword
– heck use a dragon tooth and wack people with it
– imminent beanpole
– there’s an armour set with golden tits on it that makes you look like an egg with a face
– become a legend
– daddy mask
– amazing chest ahead
– there’s a boss called the ceaseless discharge
– dog with sword
– owner of dog with sword with sad backstory that makes you cry
– the graphics and particle effects give you a boner
– anal rodeo
– blighttown is the best town
– enemies try and hide in pots
– you break those pots
– mushrooms can punch you
– open the chest its a fucking surprise
– gravity is your best friend
– progressively larger skeletons in each area
– BUT BABY SKELETONS
– get squished by a demon’s ass. THREE SEPARATE TIMES!
– welcome to the house of fun
– snake people are secretly the government
– 69 TIME HEAVY WEIGHT CHAMPION JOHN CENA SOLOS A BOSS FIGHT FOR YOU
– space jam theme plays while fighting scully and mulder
– a giant wet condom with a moustache appears out of the plumbing
– you get to fight 4 starfish. AT ONCE.
– a giant, on fire, caterpillar
– git gud
– absolve your sins by talking to the man who sins himself
– summon your friends! and let them do all the work for you!
– an onion man becomes your best friend
– there’s a dragon which looks like a vagina with teeth
– that gender neutral armour tho
– look at all these npcs with heart wrenching backstories. EVEN THE BOSSES MAKE YOU CRY.
– music. the music.
– spider woman and her sister make an appearance. she carries a giant flaming sword.
– solaire
– just play the game for him
– play the game for solaire
– praise the fucking sun
remaster is coming out, this post is still relevant
the vault dweller: i have an important mission i must fulfill
the chosen one: i have an important destiny i must fulfill
the lone wanderer: i have an important dad i must find
the courier: [doing roundhouse kicks and making wooshing noises in the middle of the mojave to a radio playing “ain’t that a kick in the head”]
Hugh Jackman did not work on The Greatest Showman for 7 years and split his cancer treatment stitches at the final pitch for it by singing even though he was told not to just to have less Oscar nominations than The Disaster Artist
so apparently some people feel like it’s annoying when someone engages with a lot of stuff from the same person, like going through their ship tag and liking all the content there.
hearing about this, i was immediately paranoid about reblogging literally anything from anyone i don’t talk to on a regular basis.
so to save others from the same paranoia, i’m gonna say that if you like every single post on my goddamn blog it is okay. i might be kind of concerned about your level of time management, going through 23,000 posts, but it wouldn’t bother me.
I’ve had people discover my blog and do this, and honestly I consider it a huge compliment. Don’t be shy, blow up my notes, enjoy my total bullshit.
projecting all ur issues™ onto fictional characters is a time honored tradition. if kafka can give a cockroach his depression and deepseated fears of uselessness i can give a comic book character my personality disorder and sexual traumas. god’s dead and soon we will be too so in 2018 write all the weirdly specific Coping Fic you want and don’t let people get on your case about it
Time's Vengeance 