gallusrostromegalus:

• Cooing lovingly over the miniscule cup fungi on a rotting stick.
• “This took me 15 years to figure out. In the ‘Fine Art’ world that would make it a ‘Trade Secret’, but we’re all communists here, so let me show you so you don’t waste your time.”
• *Pencil falls on the floor* *CHORUS OF HORRIFIED GASPS*
• “Do we need calipers for this?” 
  “Only if you’re a weenie.”
• Prismacolor: The Pencil That Smiles Back!
• “Very nice color here!  what is that?” 
  “It’s, uh.  Blood.”
  “But it’s such a fugitive pigment!  How are you going to archive this?”
• Eating part of your sample to make the composition more interesting
• “Mervi did you sew this bee’s wings together?”
• Drawing in irregular dimensions just to tell Jenna where she can stick her her 16×20 frames.
• A U B E R G I E N E S
• “How many color pencils do you HAVE?” 
  “I don’t know.  My nephew got bored counting at 8000.”
• S E N E S S E N C E
• Orchid People ™
• Mervi Will Notice If You Do It Wrong And Will Be Very Disappointed With You So Do It Right, Jackass
• The McCauleys, getting in trouble in the back row again.
• DO YOUR HAND STRETCHES
• WEAR YOUR GLASSES
• KEEP YOUR COFFEE AND PAINT WATER ON OPPOSITE SIDES
• “If you could invent a new color, what would you call it?”
  “Fred.”
• “We all know Meredith is a witch and that’s fine, we just want to know the name of the Dark God she sacrifies goats to so we can get in on that.”
• Faber-Castell WHY did you discontinue the Magic Purple?
• “Can’t you write longhand?” 
  “No.  It’s Regan’s fault.”
• Snitching samples from around the gardens.
• “This is a beautiful composition.  If you mess up the label, I will have you flogged.”
• Small Children randomly wandering into the classroom.
• I Chose This Subject Because It’s Beautiful And Complicated And I’m Regretting That Choice But No Bitchass Leaf Is Going To get The Best Of Me
• “I think the technical term is ‘Fiddly Bits’.”
• “What’s the weirdest thing anyone’s said about your art?”
  “A woman once told me I do beautiful photography.”