I just discovered there isa small subredditdedicated to google-translating (and actually dubbing, very professionally!!) the Star Wars movies and occasional SWR episodes from english into chinese and back into english again, making the subtitles change ridiculously, and it’s positively the most hilarious thing I’ve ever come across since I saw the LotR post about a similar thing, here are some highlights:
I don’t know what it is about Star Wars but even if it’s not your biggest fandom, it still has the funniest memes by a long shot I mean “look at all the fucks i give anakin” and “your poncho is a piece of junk” and anakin hates sand it’s all just 1000% pure class
what i mean: the prequels may be flawed in directing, acting, dialogue, etc. which at many points make them seem comically awful as movies, and they may be widely reviled by both casual and die hard audiences, but despite that i enjoyed the overall story told, the characters introduced, and the depth and world building it added to the star wars universe.
what people think i mean: the prequels are a cinematic masterpiece without any flaws and i want you to start hurling insults at me
The Star Wars Wiki says, “While C-3PO underwent a memory wipe, R2-D2 was allowed to preserve his memories.” And I am delighted, because 1) I was pretty sure this was the case, but couldn’t remember exactly (R2 is a conniving sneak and I was pretty sure it wouldn’t have worked even if anyone had been foolish enough to try), and 2) this means one of my favorite Star Wars headcanons is actually canon.
It means that during that one scene in Empire Strikes Back, these two assholes know EXACTLY who the other one is.
You are decorated war veterans, you absolute trolls.
Yoda had 20 plus years to prep for this moment and this is probably what he picked on like the second day
Yoda had 20 plus years to prep for this moment and this is probably what he picked on like the second day <- Holy shit, this is the truest thing I’ve ever read. That is absolutely what he did.
Also, I have a couple of things I want to clarify on this post.
Because of the Luke and R2 exchange right before they land on Dagobah, when Luke is explaining that they’re going to find Yoda, an old Jedi Master, and R2 appears to be like, “whomst??” I now hold the headcanon that while R2 knew who Yoda was, he didn’t actually know Yoda’s name. So when they got down to Dagobah, R2 was absolutely like, “OH SHIT, IT’S YOU. HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL ALIVE, GIVE ME BACK THE FLASHLIGHT, WHY DOES NO LISTEN TO ME, BACK OFF YOU GREEN SOCK, I’LL FINISH THE JOB MYSELF, I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING AROUND HERE.”
And since droid rights are absolute shit, for R2, when I say “decorated war veteran”, I’m not referring to medals. (Although Anakin absolutely made medals for his droid too, because R2 was there and did, like, ALL the work.) I’m referring to arrest warrants.
Most of R2’s memory is called The Shit List (With Receipts), with file folders on some of the galaxy’s most notorious and significant figures. Yoda has three folders. Anakin/Vader has five. So does Obi-Wan. The person with the most folders is Threepio (Designation: Useless Husband), bc R2 has never really let an argument go in his life.
The only person who doesn’t have a shit list is BB-8, who has Never Done A Blessed Thing Wrong In Her Life. (R2 can and will fight you.)
And there was never another Rogue One callsign ever – and when the Rogue Group flew the Rogue leader was always back and to the right of true lead position, because it was understood. It was believed. It was known.
Rogue One would always fly with their group, because the Force was with them.
FYI this is called ‘missing man formation’ and is done in honor and remembrance of a fallen pilot I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING
Time's Vengeance 