taibhsearachd:

ruffboijuliaburnsides:

jessicalockeisveryconfused:

ruffboijuliaburnsides:

taibhsearachd:

So apparently in Skyrim, if you just eat all your stolen items in between the “wait I know you” and actually getting arrested, the guard will just… walk away???

I LEGITIMATELY DOWNLOADED AND INSTALLED SKYRIM JUST TO TEST THIS.

I COULDNT STOP LAUGHING AFTERWARDS.

You do know you can just… keep walking, right? Also why are you only stealing food items???

1) it’s not about the fact that you can keep walking

2) it’s not about playing properly only stealing food

It’s about CAN YOU, if your only stolen items are food, eat them all and get out of being arrested. The answer is yes.

If you’re trying to make this into some sort of logic or reason thing you are not playing Skyrim correctly my dude.

It’s about the mental image of a guard starting to apprehend you, watching you devour three cheese wheels in like half a second (presumably looking him dead in the eyes as you do), and deciding that he is not getting paid enough to deal with this bullshit.

bloodcountessabendroth:

fuckindiva:

Short Films by George Méliès

Le Manoir du Diable (1896) (considered the first horror film in history)
Une nuit terrible (1896)
Le Chateau Hanté (1897)
Le Diable Au Couvent (1899)
Évocation Spirite (1899)
Le diable géant ou Le miracle de la madonne (1901)
Le chaudron infernal (1903)
Le cake-walk infernal (1903)
Le monstre (1903)
Le diable noir (1905)
Les quatre cents farces du diable (1906)

Other Short Films

The Sealed Room (1909)
Frankenstein (1910)
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1913)
The Fall of the House of Usher (1928)

Famous Classic Horror Films 

Das Kabinett des Doktor Caligari (1920)
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1920)
Nosferatu (1922)
Häxan (1922)
Orlacs Hände (1924)
The Phantom of the Opera (1925)
Vampyr (1932)
House on Haunted Hill (1959)
Plan 9 from Outer Space (1956)
The Bat (1959)
The Last Man on Earth (1964)
Night of the Living Dead (1968)

Other Films

10s-30s

Der Golem
(1915) // Der Golem – Wie er in die Welt Kam (1920) // Genuine (1920) // Dr.
Mabuse, der Spieler
(1922) // The Hunchback of Notre Dame (1923) // Wolf Blood (1925) // The Cat and the Canary (1927) // Svengali
(1931) // White Zombie (1932) // The Monster Walks (1933) // The Most Dangerous
Game
(1933) // Ghoul (1933) // The Vampire Bat (1933) // Maniac (1934) // The
House of Mystery
(1934) // The Beast of Borneo (1934) // The Ghost Walks (1934)
// Phantom Ship (1935) // Revolt of the Zombies (1935) //
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (1936) // The Man Who Changed His Mind (1936) // The Rogues’ Tavern (1936) //

夜半歌聲 (Ye Ban Ge Sheng)

(1937) // The
Riders of the Whistling Skull
(1937) // The Devil’s Daughter (1939) // The Face
at the Window
(1939) // Torture Ship (1939)

40s-50s

The Mummy’s
Hand
(1940) // The Devil Bat (1940) // The Ape (1940) // Doomed to Die (1940)
// King of the Zombies (1940) // Invisible Ghost (1940) // Spooks Run Wild (1941)
// The Ghost Train (1941) // The Mad Monster (1942) // Bowery at Midnight
(1942) // The Corpse Vanishes (1942) // The Living Ghost (1942) // The Ape Man
(1943) // Dead Men Walk (1943) // The Ghost and the Guest (1943) // The Monster
Maker
(1944) // Voodoo Man (1944) // One Body Too Many (1944) // The Flying
Serpent
(1946) // Devil Monster (1946) // Mesa of Lost Women (1953) // The Snow
Creature
(1954) // The Phantom from 10,000 Leagues (1955) // Dementia (1955) //
Indestructible Man (1956) // La maldición de la momia azteca (1957) // 20
Million Miles to Earth
(1957) // Frankenstein’s Daughter (1958) // La momia
azteca contra el robot humano
(1958) // Night of the Blood Beast (1958) // The
Screaming Skull
(1958) // I Bury the Living (1958) // The Devil’s Partner (1958) // Attack of the Giant
Leeches
(1959) // A Bucket of Blood (1959) // Beast from Haunted Cave (1959) //
The Killer Shrews (1959) // The Wasp Woman (1959) // The Manster (1959) //
Terror is a Man (1959)

60s – 70s

Teenage Zombies
(1960) // Horror Hotel (1960) // The Little Shop of Horrors (1960) // Atom Age
Vampire
(1960) //

Ein Toter hing im Netz

(1960) // 13 Ghosts (1960) // Tormented
(1960) // Last Woman on Earth (1960) // The Naked Witch (1961) // The Beast of Yucca Flats (1961) // Creature from the Haunted Sea
(1961) // Werewolf in a Girls’ Dormitory (1961) // Night Tide (1961) // The Devil’s Messenger (1961) // Bloodlust! (1961) // Eegah
(1962) // Carnival Of Souls (1962) // The Brain that Wouldn’t Die (1962) // The
Devil’s Hand
(1961) // Hands of a Stranger (1962) // The Dungeon of Harrow
(1962) // Trauma (1962) // El barón del terror (1962) // Ring of Terror (1962)
// Terror of the Bloodhunters (1962) // The Terror (1963) // Dementia 13 (1963)
// Monstrosity: The Atomic Brain (1963) //

À Meia-Noite Levarei Sua Alma

(1964) // Two Thousand
Maniacs!
(1964) // The Strangler (1964) // The Faceless Monster (1965) // Il
boia scarlatto
(1965) // Creature of the Walking Dead (1965) // The Beach Girls
and the Monster
(1965) // The Eye Creatures (1965) // The She Beast (1966) //
Jesse James Meets Frankenstein’s Daughter (1966) // Manos – The Hands of Fate (1966) // Curse of the Swamp Creature
(1966) // Night Fright (1967) // Creature of Destruction (1967) // Spider Baby
or The Maddest Story Ever Told
(1967) // In the Year 2889 (1967) // The Ghosts
of Hanley House
(1968) // It’s Alive! (1969) // How Awful About Allan (1970) //

La figlia di Frankenstein

(1971) // Blood Thirst (1971) // Snake People (1971) // Horror Express (1972) // Frankenstein ‘80 (1972)

Click here for more

Here’s a list with almost 200 public domain horror movies

I’ve seen a lot of the movies on this list and here are some of the best ones.  Also, I just wanna note that some of the movies listed on here are not actually in the public domain so if I skip over an especially good one like The Mummies Hand that’s why.  Also, most public domain horror movies are pretty awful so your standard of good might be very different than mine.  These ones I consider to be at least the most watchable for more of a general audience. I like lots of the bad ones too. 😛

Silent movies – Nosferatu, (recommend that everyone sees this at least once) Phantom of the Opera, Haxan (more of a creepy documentary with cool imagery)  

“Famous Classic horror films”

House of Haunted Hill, (Vincent Price in a great haunted house flick), The Last Man on Earth, (Vincent Price again in the best adaptation of I Am Legend committed to film) Night of The Living Dead, (nuff said) and they have Plan 9 from outer space listed there which is not at all scary but really fun to watch.

10′s – 30′s

White Zombie, (Lugosi in his prime!) The Vampire Bat

40s-50s

The Devil Bat, (More Lugosi!) I Bury The Living, (pretend the ending doesn’t happen) The Manster, (wtf) Terror is a Man, (I actually really like this one)  Note –  I’m a big fan of Poverty Row horror but I can’t recommend them to everyone.  They’re still really interesting and a guilty pleasure, so if you want check out The Ape Man, Bowery at Midnight, The Ape and King of The Zombies.

60′s – 70′s

Spider Baby, (strongly recommended!) Horror Express, (Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing!) Horror Hotel, (Christopher Lee again) 13 Ghosts, Werewolf in a Girl’s Dormitory, (ok so it’s cheesy but fun imo) Nightmare Castle, (gothic euro horror not for everyone but I like it) La figila di Frankenstein aka Lady Frankenstein, (more gothic euro horror this one with lots of blood, sleaze and monster action!)

I’ve seen waaaaaaay too many of these movies.

corvidcaron:

amphitryo:

awa64:

siphersaysstuff:

unpretty:

unpretty:

some dudes like to talk a big game about how comedy suffers when people are afraid to offend but man, Mitch Hedberg was a white dude working in the era of peak offensive edgelord and his shit holds the fuck up so while most comedians will never come up with anything as timeless as “if carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be fucked up” they could at least make an effort

  • Every McDonald’s commercial ends the same way, right? “Prices and participation may vary.” I wanna open a McDonald’s and not participate in anything. I wanna be a stubborn McDonald’s owner. I’ll say “Cheeseburgers? Nope. We got spaghetti! And blankets! We are not affiliated with that clown.”
  • Every book is a children’s book if the kid can read.
  • I would like to have a product that was available for three easy payments and one fuckin’ complicated payment. We can’t tell you which payment it is, but one of these payments is gonna be a bitch! The mailman will get shot to death, the envelope will not seal, and the stamp will be in the wrong denomination! Good luck, fucker! That last payment must be made in wampum!
  • Hey, if you wanna talk to me after the show, I’ll be… fuckin’ surprised.
  • This shirt is “dry-clean only”… Which means it’s dirty.
  • One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said “Here’s a picture of me when I was younger.” Every picture is of you when you were younger. “Here’s a picture of me when I’m older.” “You son-of-a-bitch! How’d you pull that off? Lemme see that camera… What’s it look like? ”
  • An escalator can never break, it can only become stairs. You would never see an “Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order” sign, just “Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.
  • I play golf. I’m not good at golf, I never got good. I never got a hole-in-one. But I did hit a guy. And that’s way more satisfying. You’re supposed to yell “Fore!” but I was too busying mumbling “There ain’t no way that’s gonna hit him.”
  • When you’re in Hollywood and you’re a comedian, everybody wants you to do other things besides comedy. They say “All right you’re a stand up comedian, can you act? Can you write? Write us a script.” They want me to do things that’s related to comedy, but it’s not comedy. That’s not fair. It’s as though if I was a cook, and I worked my ass off to become a good cook, and they said “All right you’re a cook… can you farm?”

– “Rice is great when you’re you’re hungry and you want 10,000 of something”

– “Tennis is depressing because no matter how good you get, you will never be as good as a wall”

– “I order the club sandwich all the time, but I’m not even a member, man. I don’t know how I get away with it”

No one can tell me they didn’t read these in his voice.